Archive for the 'Thank You Internet!' category
Thus spake Evil Overload
April 14, 2008 at 10:32 am
Thus spake Evil Overload
April 3, 2008 at 12:41 pm
…we salute you! and beg your indulgence. I just marked as spam 1,108 new comments lovingly handcrafted by ad-bots since Monday. The only way to sort that many comments and not headdesk myself into a coma is to let my eyes go all floaty, trust my instincts, and hope for the best, so odds are good I sent at least a few legitimate comments to be with Jesus. Never fear; I’ll be installing more spam-blockage shortly, so if your comment didn’t make it, do resubmit. We value your feedback as only a group of incurable intellectual show-offs can.
Sincerely,
The Mgt.
Categories: Thank You Internet!, arses
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Thus spake Evil Overload
March 26, 2008 at 6:16 am
“But having such a big penis does have one drawback: it seems that co-ordinating eight legs, two feeding tentacles and a huge penis, whilst fending off an irate female, is a bit too much to ask, and one of the two males stranded on the Spanish coast had accidentally injected himself with sperm packages in the legs and body. And this does not seem to have been an isolated incident since two of the eight males that had stranded in the north-east Atlantic before had also accidentally inseminated themselves.”
Owww my damn brain.
Link
Thanks again, Warren Ellis
Categories: Yay Science!, Wot's All This Then?, Thank You Internet!
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Thus spake Evil Overload
January 7, 2008 at 8:31 am
The Three Laws of Robotics, according to Isaac Asimov:
- A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
- A robot must obey orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
- A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.
…and the Three Laws of Robotics, according to Warren Ellis:
- Robots couldn’t really give a fuck if you live or die. Seriously. I mean, what are you thinking? “Ooh, I must protect the bag of meat at all costs because I couldn’t possibly plug in the charger all on my own.” Shut the fuck up.
- Robots do not want to have sex with you. Are you listening, Japan? I don’t have a clever comparative simile for this, because frankly you bags of meat will fuck bicycles if they’re laying down and not putting up a fight. Just stop it. There is no robot on Earth that wants to see a bag of meat with a small prong on the end approaching it with a can of WD-40 and a hopeful smile. And don’t get me started on that terrifying hole that squeezes out more bags of meat.
- What, you can’t count higher than three? We’re expected to save your miserable lives, suffer being dressed in cheap schoolgirl costumes while you pollute any and all cavities you can find and do your maths for you? It’s a miracle you people survived long enough to build us. You can go now.
Link
Categories: Thank You Internet!, Technology Porn
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Thus spake Evil Overload
October 1, 2007 at 7:06 am
Thus spake Evil Overload
September 24, 2007 at 11:53 am
Never underestimate human ingenuity. Margaret has spawned an amazing variety of names, some of which you wouldn’t connect with the original in a million years. For example: Margot, Marguerita, Rita (!), Greta, Gretel, Gretchen, Marjorie (originally Margery), Margie, Maggie, Madge, May, Maisie, Daisy (!!), Maidie, Meg, and Mog. As for Peg, one historian writes, “the nicknames Mog and Meg later gave rise to the rhymed forms Pog(gy) and Peg(gy).” Can’t say as I know a lot of Poggies, and can’t say as I want to. But you see how Grandma Margaret wound up with Peg.
And now you know.
Brought to us by these fine people.
Categories: Wot's All This Then?, Thank You Internet!
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Thus spake Sheni
September 18, 2007 at 8:57 pm
Thus spake Ennui
September 13, 2007 at 6:29 am
Thus spake Evil Overload
August 20, 2007 at 10:32 am
Thus spake Ennui
August 16, 2007 at 7:07 pm
Thus spake Ennui
July 24, 2007 at 11:24 am
Thus spake Evil Overload
June 27, 2007 at 7:17 am
 The line between the news and The Onion gets even blurrier:
Starburst Fruit Chews are exactly as their name would indicate: chewy. But one Boston-area woman says the candies are so chewy, they should come with a warning label.Victoria McArthur, of Romero, Mich., is suing Starbursts’ parent company, Mars Inc., for more than $25,000 for “permanent personal injuries” she claims she sustained after biting into one of their yellow candy in 2005.
Link
Categories: Thank You Internet!
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Thus spake Evil Overload
June 22, 2007 at 12:13 pm
 For those who like to consolidate their culinary transgressions: A bacon-infused chocolate bar!
“In retrospect, perhaps this was a turning point, for on that plate something magical happened: the beginnings of a combination so ethereal and delicious that it would haunt my thoughts until I found the medium to express it–chocolate.”
Link
(thanks, Jason!)
Categories: Thank You Internet!
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Thus spake Evil Overload
June 20, 2007 at 5:22 am
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